The stereotypical girl has a long list of gentleman acts and precedes it by saying, “every girl wants a guy who”. My thoughts include: not me, I just want a guy that believes in the same political and moral standpoints as me.
Why people ask me shit like “how was work?” or “how is school?” like work is work, school is school, I would rather be on a yacht right now while gettin some dick but here I am
do you ever shift in bed slightly and suddenly youre in the most perfect sleeping position ever and you feel like the fucking planets are aligned
nice try mom
me: *doesn’t shave*
me: damn i look like a GQ model or some shit
everyone else: who is that crusty man